If you’ve ever wanted to write a self-help bestseller like Mark Manson, but hate the idea of actually giving helpful advice.
Then step into Snarky Suzie's masterclass.
Forget years of study, research or real life experience.
The secret is in the hustle, the contradictions, and yes—plenty of well-placed profanity aka bad words.
How to Write A Self-Help Bestseller Like A Non-Guru
Step 1: Tell People To Stop Trying So Hard
The cornerstone of every great non-guru’s philosophy is this: tell your audience to stop trying so damn hard.
The message is simple—give yourself permission to not care, to slack off, to accept mediocrity.
Because that’s relatable and comforting.
But here’s the catch: you don’t want them to *actually* stop trying.
You want them hooked, craving your next blog post, newsletter, or book.
You want them dependent on your dose of “tough love” mixed with comforting nihilism.
Step 2: Try Very Hard To Get Them To Buy Your Book
Once you’ve convinced your audience to stop trying so hard, it’s time to hard sell them your book.
Hint at exclusive secrets, drop email sign-ups like breadcrumbs, and maybe even offer a “free” e-book that’s just a teaser for your paid content.
This step is where the hustle shines brightest: you want your readers to believe that your book is the one thing standing between them and a life of enlightened apathy.
Spoiler: it’s really just a cleverly packaged hustle.
Step 3: Add Profanity = Authenticity
Nothing says “I’m the real deal” quite like a well-timed swear word.
Sprinkle your writing with profanity to build an edgy, rebellious vibe.
It’s the literary equivalent of wearing a leather jacket at a book reading.
Profanity signals authenticity to your readers.
It says, “I’m not like those polished, boring gurus—you get the raw, unfiltered me.”
Step 4: Package Contradictions As “Truth Bombs”
The secret sauce of non-guru self-help is contradiction.
Tell readers they’re already enough, but then give them a 7-step plan to be better.
Promise freedom through detachment, but sell them courses about emotional management.
Call these paradoxes “truth bombs” and watch your audience gobble them up like forbidden knowledge.
Because nothing sells better than wisdom that sounds deep, but ultimately leads nowhere.
Step 5: Monetize Your Minimalism
Minimalism is hot right now, but don’t be fooled.
It sells best when paired with a premium price tag and it will spark joy.
Sell the idea that less is more, but charge *more* for your exclusive content, merch, and coaching.
Sell the idea that less is more—then charge more for it.
Meanwhile, bookshelves are buckling under the weight of “essential” minimalist titles from Marie Kondo, Greg McKeown, and The Minimalists.
Because nothing says simplicity like a growing stack of decluttering manifestos.
Own less, buy more… advice about owning less.
Your brand’s secret: convince people to buy less stuff, but pay more for your minimalist philosophy.
The irony? The less you tell them to do, the more you get paid.
Step 6: Deny You're A Guru (Bonus: Call Other Gurus Fake)
Keep your guru status on the sly while throwing shade at every other “fake” self-help expert.
It’s the classic “I’m just a regular person sharing my story” trick that builds trust even as your empire grows.
Claiming you’re *not* a guru while acting like one gives you the perfect plausible deniability—until your next book drops and you sell out stadiums.
And If Someone Calls You Out?
Just smile and say, “It’s not self-help, it’s self-awareness.”
Nothing shuts down critics faster than rebranding your hustle as a profound philosophical movement.
Bonus Tips For Aspiring Non-Guru Bestseller
- Embrace clichés: Reinvent tired advice with a fresh twist and a sarcastic edge.
- Master the email funnel: Collect emails like a pro and nurture your audience with just enough free content to keep them hooked.
- Use catchy headlines: Promise transformation but deliver comfortingly vague platitudes.
- Stay active on socials: The non-guru life is all about visibility—drop quotes, memes, and micro-advice daily.
- Launch with fanfare: Build hype with pre-orders, giveaways, and influencer shout-outs.
Conclusion: How To Write A Self-Help Bestseller Like A Non-Guru
Writing a bestseller like a non-guru isn’t about solving anyone’s problems.
It’s about selling the *idea* of solutions, wrapped in contradictions and served with a side of profanity.
If you can master the hustle, embrace the paradox, and monetize minimalism, you’re well on your way to joining the ranks of the self-help elite—without actually being one.
So go ahead, write that book that tells people to stop trying, all while trying harder than anyone else.
Because in the world of non-guru self-help, not giving a f*ck is the best business model you’ll ever find.
👉 Check out Snark Suzie's Life Coach Detox Guide
